Schools Out
Today the latest years crime figures were released, well two lots of crime figures were actually released. I wonder if the only reason they have two is so that they can choose the one which shows the lowest figures. Of course it is. You really couldnt make it up.
Of the two surveys one is from the police which shows statistics of actual reported crime, a pretty safe way of measuring you would have thought, although not all people report all crimes - its not worth the bother sometimes. This year these figures from the police show an increase in crime over last year. So thats obviously been discounted.
The other survey is exactly that: a survey, a questionnaire to a sample of the general public:
"Hello, sorry to bother you madam. In your experience has crime affected you"
"No".
"Great, thanks"
"Hello, sorry to bother you Sir. In your experience has crime affected you?"
"Well...yes"
" Sorry, cant hear you"
"I said yes"
"Still cant hear you. Is that the time? Sorry must dash"
Not a great way of measuring i would suggest, but the key thing here is that these surveys show a reduction in crime, and as they promote such good news these are the figures the government are pinning their strategy to.
So let's get this straight, in case i'm losing you - the police say they have caught more bad people than last year and they say crime is going up, where on the other hand a few market researchers have questioned a sample of people and they deduce that crime is reducing. Who would you pay the most attention to?
Apparently the figures from the survey is comprehensive proof that the governments crackdown on crime and the fear of crime is coming to fruition - just as the election looms, how fortunate. I'm glad we've got Tony running the show - arent you?
Alcohol related crime apparently is a big problem, there's been a big increase of bad behaviour in towns up and down the country on a weekend night, and its all down to people falling over blind with the effects of happy hour. Some town centres have become a no go area for many and the police arent happy.
Its a bit late for that plod, crikey. It's due to the lax attitude of the police and magistrates in the first place when approving licensing applications for pubs in towns that are already overcrowded that have caused this problem. These places full of hostelries then offer cheap drinks to young people to get them in, get them drunk and keep them visiting. A few scraps and broken windows is a price worth paying.
And the police and magistrates wonder why alcohol related crime is up? I could give you a few leads officer - not rocket science now is it? Would you like me to show you the difference between your arse and your elbow while i'm at it?
I notice that the Houses of Parliament have broken up for their summer recess, and will back in what seems like 23 weeks time - their summer seems to last the same length of time as most peoples years. Maybe we'll all get something done now. In my next life I want to be an MP.
I wonder whether they get to wear their own clothes on the last day and are allowed to bring games in.
Of the two surveys one is from the police which shows statistics of actual reported crime, a pretty safe way of measuring you would have thought, although not all people report all crimes - its not worth the bother sometimes. This year these figures from the police show an increase in crime over last year. So thats obviously been discounted.
The other survey is exactly that: a survey, a questionnaire to a sample of the general public:
"Hello, sorry to bother you madam. In your experience has crime affected you"
"No".
"Great, thanks"
"Hello, sorry to bother you Sir. In your experience has crime affected you?"
"Well...yes"
" Sorry, cant hear you"
"I said yes"
"Still cant hear you. Is that the time? Sorry must dash"
Not a great way of measuring i would suggest, but the key thing here is that these surveys show a reduction in crime, and as they promote such good news these are the figures the government are pinning their strategy to.
So let's get this straight, in case i'm losing you - the police say they have caught more bad people than last year and they say crime is going up, where on the other hand a few market researchers have questioned a sample of people and they deduce that crime is reducing. Who would you pay the most attention to?
Apparently the figures from the survey is comprehensive proof that the governments crackdown on crime and the fear of crime is coming to fruition - just as the election looms, how fortunate. I'm glad we've got Tony running the show - arent you?
Alcohol related crime apparently is a big problem, there's been a big increase of bad behaviour in towns up and down the country on a weekend night, and its all down to people falling over blind with the effects of happy hour. Some town centres have become a no go area for many and the police arent happy.
Its a bit late for that plod, crikey. It's due to the lax attitude of the police and magistrates in the first place when approving licensing applications for pubs in towns that are already overcrowded that have caused this problem. These places full of hostelries then offer cheap drinks to young people to get them in, get them drunk and keep them visiting. A few scraps and broken windows is a price worth paying.
And the police and magistrates wonder why alcohol related crime is up? I could give you a few leads officer - not rocket science now is it? Would you like me to show you the difference between your arse and your elbow while i'm at it?
I notice that the Houses of Parliament have broken up for their summer recess, and will back in what seems like 23 weeks time - their summer seems to last the same length of time as most peoples years. Maybe we'll all get something done now. In my next life I want to be an MP.
I wonder whether they get to wear their own clothes on the last day and are allowed to bring games in.