Phone Pest

How infuriating are you? Not you, but you. Yes you, you stood next to my desk chattering away on your mobile phone. Are you meaning to be this annoying or is it an accident?

What is wrong with your own area? Why, when your phone rings do you feel the need to get up and wander round the office so that everyone is disturbed by you and your phonecall? Do you not want to disturb the people in your area? Do I have a 'disturb me' look on my face?

I dont want to hear your conversations, you're putting me off. I don't need your help in being put off, I'm an Olympic short concentration span Gold Medallist as it is without your assistance. So go and speak somewhere else, preferably at your own desk.

All suggestions for painful death for fellow office workers welcome. I like water and bare wires.