Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Tragedy in Garden Town

This is Cyril Slug. And this is the news.

The wildlife of Garden Town are waking up, or going to sleep depending on your nocturnal preferences, facing up to the true horror of yesterdays carnage. The skyline of this beautiful area is now very different from how it was yesterday.

A day that dawned much like any other in this quiet corner of the world was shattered when the 'big red bladed cutting machine' made another seemingly random foray into occupied wildlife territory, slashing indiscriminately at quickly retreating creatures and their protective habitat.

The early warning siren that sounded at 12.25pm yesterday afternoon for 10 minutes, sounded much too late for many creatures to be able to take adequate evasive action. There were unconfirmed reports however suggesting that many animals chose to ignore this sophisticated system, seemingly opting for the 'it wont get me theory'. Well that gamble seems to have seriously backfired.

2, 4, 6, 8 or no legs, it didn't seem to matter what type of animal got in the way of this brutish machine and it's accomplice.

Watski Towers

Some creatures managed to escape to the safety of the edges of the garden thinking they were out of reach of the 'Big red cutting machine', but the relief was to be short lived as the machine locally known as 'The Strimmer' arrived on the scene within minutes and proceeded to hunt them down.

Figures reaching us at East Garden today news put the missing creatures at 26, including 8 snails, 6 frogs, 4 slugs and a family of visiting spiders from next door neighbour ville.

Most of the members of Fiona Frogs family are missing, her son, Harry was last seen heading down Dandelion Way hotly pursued by the red cutting machine, he has not been seen since.

Selwyn Snail, a veteran of many incursions, watched the carnage helplessly from the relative safety of his vantage point in the rocks. He takes up the story:

"well I saw this big red machine go into the garden and start growling. It didn't move for about 10 minutes but you could tell from it's body language that it wasn't going to give in until it has removed every single blade of grass in garden town"

his wife Cynthia added:

"ooh, it was a scary thing wasn't it Selwyn? When it growled you could see that there were still lots of creatures going about their daily business seemingly thinking that it wouldn't happen to them. But it did and it was too late. I tried to shout to them but they couldn't hear"

We will have more on this story once we get it. In other news, Willam the Worm returned to East Garden yesterday after a 4 year journey from the house over the road.

Keep it GardenTV, after the news: 'When slug pellets attack'